and then there were four.

And now for the news that I've been meaning to share for weeks, but have been too busy to actually write a post about!

I'm too lazy/technologically inept to size that photo correctly, but here's the sign a little closer up:

(thanks to my wonderful friend Tanya for taking these pics!!!)

YAY!! I'm thirteen weeks tomorrow, so we're due in June (which is what it says inside that heart up there). Crazy crazy crazy. Oh, and the other reason I haven't mentioned anything here yet is that I have been epically, horrifically, almost constantly sick. It was NEVER like this during my first pregnancy. I mean, I felt nauseated a lot of the time, and definitely exhausted, but this is next-level sick. Part of me feels like I shouldn't complain because I haven't actually been actively puking; I just feel like I'm going to about 90% of my waking hours. And even worse than the nausea is the heartburn, which is present most days and wakes me up some nights. It's not a burning sensation - it's this weird feeling like my throat is full with a huge lump. Which, of course, makes me want to puke.

Now that I'm closing in on the end of the first trimester, I'm starting to have more good days than bad, but it's been rough. I think part of the reason it's been so much harder is that I can't escape when I feel terrible. Yes, I can have J.J. or my mother-in-law be with Rowan (and trust me, they have been), but sometimes that's not an option. There's been a whole lotta Daniel Tiger up in here lately. And during my first pregnancy, I could retreat to my office while I was at work and just sort of feel miserable by myself, or I could call in sick if I felt truly awful (although I don't think I ever felt bad enough to do that). Not only do I have no office to hide in now, but I can't call in when I have work outside the home - I just have to go to my consulting appointments and article interviews. It's all worked out, obviously, but I was struggling for a couple months there.

And as for the big sister?

She's oblivious for now! We haven't told Rowan yet, but we will soon. Nine months is a long time for a three-year-old to wait - or, more accurately, for me to field a three-year-old's constant questions about whether the baby is here yet. I know she'll be excited, though, considering she's literally been asking for a baby for a year and a half. She talks about being a big sister constantly; she sets aside old toys of hers "for when we have a baby"; and a few weeks ago, she had a meltdown because she couldn't figure out where her car seat would go when we had a new baby who needed a car seat, too. We babysat for my friends' baby over the summer, and Rowan will still randomly mention that she's going to be a good big sister because she was such a big helper when baby Emmie was here. So - who knows what she'll be like when there's an actual infant in the house, but at least she'll be thrilled that one is on the way!

...Which is pretty much how I'm feeling, too. :)